Lucky for us that would never happen

At least the one in mythology was harmless.

All kinds of things wind up in my inbox, most of which are unsolicited and quickly deleted. Still, I take a look every now and then. This weekend, I received a post from writer and public speaker Linda Arnold titled "You Just Can’t Reason With Some People – Here’s Why."

Among other things, she discusses narcissistic personality disorder, a mental disorder identified in the DSM-5 manual of the American Psychiatric Association. 


Arnold presents the following checklist and asks if it rings any bells with anyone in our lives:

Has a grandiose sense of self importance

Is unwilling to identify with the needs and feelings of others

Has a sense of entitlement – unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment

or automatic compliance with his or her expectations

Believes he or she is unique and special

Requires excessive admiration

Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty or ideal love

Takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends

Is often envious of others or believes others are envious of him or her

Often acts in an arrogant fashion

After checking that list, I thought, golly gee, wouldn't it be unfortunate if such a person were in a position of global responsibility? Like, you know....sad!

WEEKEND SPECIAL: THE UNTRUSTWORTHY REPTILE OFFERS A CURE FOR WINTER BLUES

For first time readers, this blog generally discusses fairly serious human issues during the week. Weekends, however, are reserved for the contributions of various animals in and around Goat Rope Farm.

This weekend, we are not altogether pleased to feature a commentary by a snapping turtle who refuses to give his name and is known only as the Untrustworthy Reptile. The views expressed by this contributor and other talking animals are not necessarily those of the staff of Goat Rope, nor do we assume any liability for those who act upon these views. In fact, we believe that doing so would be a particularly bad idea in this case.

Despite our reservations, we have decided to run this commentary because of our deep commitment to the First Amendment, although the extent to which it applies to reptiles is not clear. It is our hope that providing space for the expression (bio) diverse viewpoints will promote a greater appreciation of both the humanities and the animalities.

THE UNTRUSTWORTHY REPTILE ON CURING WINTERTIME BLUES

Hey you--with the face. C'mere. You look like hell. I think you got a case of SAD. That stands for Sorry @$$ Dude--I mean Seasonal Affective Disorder. This winter weather must be killing you. You look kind of dead already.

I won't even talk about shrinkage...

Look at me--see any snow here? Do I look like an icicle? I'm warm as can be. I have this special force field all around me that keeps me nice and toasty. I got my own sunshine.

You know how I do it? I got this special ointment, see. It's made from platypus urea--a top secret recipe. All I gotta do is rub a little on me and it's permanent springtime. You could use a little of that.

Today is your lucky day. It just so happens that I've got a little vial on me. I'll let you try it free. Let's see...where did I put it. Oh yeah, I remember now. It's right here in my mouth.

All you gotta do is reach in there and get it. Just stick your hand part way in there for a second. Just a little bit. Come on, go ahead. Just for a second...

Hey! Where are you going? Come back here! OK, fine--I hope you shrivel up and freeze! I hate you!

GOAT ROPE ADVISORY LEVEL: ELEVATED