September 21, 2007
WEEKEND SPECIAL: INTRODUCING THE POULTRY PALEONTOLOGIST
Note to first time readers: It is the policy of this blog to cover fairly serious issues during the week. Weekends, however, are reserved for the commentaries of various animals in and around Goat Rope Farm.
This week, we are pleased to introduce a new commentator, Ethel Fuzzy Chicken, the Poultry Paleontologist. Ms. Fuzzy Chicken is our resident paleontologist and all round science expert. Her topic this week is a recent discovery regarding the dinosaur known as velociraptor.
It is our deepest hope that (bio) diverse features such as this will promote a greater appreciation of both the humanities and the animalities.
INTRODUCING THE POULTRY PALEONTOLOGIST
Hey--check this out. This is so awesome! Do you remember that movie Jurassic Park? Remember those velociraptor thingies? The ones that could chase you down and cut your gizzard out in a heartbeat?
That was cool.
Well, anyway, check this out. Oh, wait, I already said that. My bad. What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the velociraptor--well, get this--they just found out that they had quill knobs on their bones.
You probably don't know anything about quill knobs. That's cause you're probably a mammal.
Jeez, you guys think we're stupid. Whatever...
But anyway--where was I?--oh yeah, quill knobs mean it had FEATHERS!!!
You remember feathers, right? Those cool things you mammals are too stupid to have?
Does anybody else you know have feathers? Hmmm, wait a minute. Let me think. Birds have feathers. I have feathers. That means it was a bird like me. Just like me! That means I'm just like it! That's right. I'm BAD. Nobody better mess with me or I'll eat their gizzard.
GOAT ROPE ADVISORY LEVEL: ELEVATED